Home | Join! | Help | Browse | Forums | NuWorld | NWF | PoPo   


















Twitter
Follow silverdotty on Twitter
Gimme a call
A Heartfelt Email
Thursday. 1.3.08 10:02 pm
" Happy Holidays everyone!

To All My On-line Friends:

As the holidays approach, my heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12 months. Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy.

Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes 'cause I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.

Also, I scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

And, I don't use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I won't use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.

I don't go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from nor send packages by UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I won't answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

And, I never eat KFC because their "chickens" are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike.

I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I'm not worried about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

I don't have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time)

I no longer have any money at all - but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program.


Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor!


If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked case of diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00 PM this afternoon. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next-door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.

Have a wonderful day....


P. S.: A South American scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain and sexual activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.


Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late. "




theDot: *cackle*
Recommended by 7 Members
randomjunk Nuttz LostSoul13 AmbyrJayde crz4manga merrick bluetopaz
10 Comments.


Thank you for that heartfelt and deeply educational email. I will now send this to all of the members of NuTang within the next 7 minutes.
» dave on 2008-01-03 10:19:04

So KFC has mutants but McDonald's doesn't? What a strange twist of fate...
» randomjunk on 2008-01-03 11:28:48

i still drink coca cola but not everyday like some people i know.
» renaye on 2008-01-03 11:36:32

LOL o_O
is it true? XD
and my hand was on the mouse... cause i was scrolling down and too lazy to remove it -_- it should be that they are lazy XD
» crz4manga on 2008-01-03 11:44:22

ROFL!
That's a good one Dotty dear. BTW, what's the name of your font?
» Nuttz on 2008-01-04 12:22:02

ahahhaaha i've received that one before too XD there's another version of it which includes more fwd-mickey-takings i think XD i died laughing the first time i read it XD
xxx

L8r,

—×Kuri×—
» Kuri on 2008-01-04 01:40:26

hahaha! I love it! do you mind if I take it and send it to a few people who I know would get a kick out of it?
» LostSoul13 on 2008-01-04 04:59:19

Haha, that's cute.

The letter? To Amazon? It was just "What the heck, I know it's free and there's a holiday, but for a first experience with something ' so great', I'm now pretty skeptical. Also, would it hurt to let me know when shipping dates change?"
» ikimashokie on 2008-01-05 01:04:20

omg
i had my hand on the mouse the whole time, omg
» AmbyrJayde on 2008-01-05 10:41:28

oh man, that's embarrassing. Hand on the mouse. ouch. All my money went to the diposed king of nigeria who temporarily needed an American bank account in which to deposit his millions.
» Zanzibar on 2008-01-06 07:41:01

Sorry, you do not have permission to comment.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.

Silver-dot-'s Weblog Site • NuTang.com

NuTang is the first web site to implement PPGY Technology. This page was generated in 0.033seconds.

  Send to a friend on AIM | Set as Homepage | Bookmark Home | NuTang Collage | Terms of Service & Privacy Policy | Link to Us | Monthly Top 10s
All content © Copyright 2003-2047 NuTang.com and respective members. Contact us at NuTang[AT]gmail.com.